Heather Mills bludgeons homeless man with leg

NEW YORK, PROBABLY -- Sir Paul McCartney's estranged wife Mrs Sir Heather McCartney-Mills-McCartney sunk to a new low yesterday when she was seen beating up a homeless man in the street -- with her own artificial leg.

Aghast onlookers looked on aghast as Mills (39), in the US while filming the reality TV show Dancing with the Stars, detached her prosthesis and used it to bludgeon the defenceless vagrant repeatedly in the face and torso, after he asked her if she had any spare "dimes".

According to passerby Senator Hilary Clinton, Mills -- dubbed "Mucca" by the Sun newspaper -- screeched "I am Lady Heather McCartney, and you are not getting a penny from me!" while beating the luckless tramp unconscious. Mills is widely expected to receive £40m in her divorce from the former Beatle.

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Winehouse cancels gig due to "forseen circumstances"

Amy Winehouse's management company have described her last-minute cancellation of a gig at London's Shepherds Bush Empire this week as "wholly predictable".

A statement issued on Friday morning said that "We apologise for the cancellation of Thursday night's concert, which was as disappointing as it was inevitable."

The statement went on to explain that the event has been rescheduled for next month, when it will again be cancelled at the last minute.