There is no escape!
Fame Academy loser PETER BRAME openly playing with himself in a bus shelter in Penzance
Radio 1 disc-jockey JO WHILEY happy-slapping pensioners on the Morecambe sea-front
Public Enemy clock-loving jester FLAVOR FLAV shoplifting rawlplugs and fuses from B&Q in Norwich
Erstwhile Pulp frontman JARVIS COCKER trying to get himself noticed in London's fashionable Hoxton district
Formerly cool New Yorkers THE STROKES paintballing on a team-building weekend in County Durham
Slightly famous idiot DUNCAN JAMES making a bloody nuisance of himself in Hull
Readers! Have YOU spotted a famous pop star out and about? Then for God's sake, keep it to yourself.
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